A game of would I rather...

At the thought of re-immersing myself in the dating scene:
– I would rather step my bare feet on thumbtacks every morning
– I would rather have weekly gynecological checkups
– I would rather have monthly root canals
– I would rather watch the PGA Tour, followed by the US Open, followed by the Masters
– I would rather grow nose hair
– I would rather be limited to Comic Sans
– I would rather be forced to wear flats everyday
– I would rather have a ménage a trois with John Mayer and Jack Johnson
– I would rather eat squab
– I would rather everyday was Valentine's Day
– I would rather spend Friday nights tweezing
– I would rather be denied caffeine
– I would rather pick up neighborhood dog shit
– I would rather go to "dry" baby showers every weekend
– I would rather...
– I would rather...
– I would rather...