Mouth is Preggers

And she was nervous to tell me. She actually told May (and the Office), “Melissa is going to be so mad at me.” The news was broken to the Office while I was at Home Depot for lunch. I needed to pick up the frosted vinyl you put on windows (nosey neighbor) for privacy and I also have the current need to paint everything a vivid shade of jade green, so... paint chips. I also thought looking at paint colors would calm me down a bit. I was having a shitty morning–the kind of morning where your having your morning coffee/looking forward to the day/enjoying the sunshine and someone sends you a string of annoying messages that puts a stinky turd on your desk.

So, I walk back into my office and set my purse down on my desk (the turd is still there). And, Mouth says she has something to tell me (with a crazy smile that says-this is going to be good). I’m like ok, stop grinning at me all crazy, what is it??? “I’m pregnant,” she says. I let out a WTF scream that really means–stop BSing me, I’m not in the mood. But then I see that she is serious and I’m in a lil bit of shock. My awkward response is to say, “I guess I’m expected to be nice to you now or don’t expect me to be nice to you now (1 of the 2).” In general, I handle awkward situations with inappropriate humor. I also told her how unbloated she looked for 4 months ;) Honestly, It never dawned on me that she might be having more kids and YES, I always b*tch (light-heartedly) about all my baby-poppin’ friends. That is probably why she was nervous of my reaction. My b*tching is mainly about all the showers I have to attend that are absolutely no freakin’ fun for single chics (especially when their rubbin’ your belly asking when’s your turn, ugh!). I do like babies for the record, just in small doses.

Anyways, I am very happy for Mouth. She is already a super mommy. The only thing that kinda sours the situation is that she will be leaving at the end of the school year... Boo. I’m booing for purely selfish reasons.