Why my Gma can out muscle your Gma

By far the sauciest woman I know...

• She says, "Leaving the house without a watch is like leaving the house without panties." I have subscribed to this theory for most of my life and if I leave the house without a watch my day is pretty much shot.
• I have to be careful on the compliments that I give her because she will give me the necklace off her neck, the bracelet off her wrist, the earrings off her ears... just to make me happy.
• She reminds me to, "hace pee pee," every time before leaving the house.
• She always smells like sweet Shalimar. A woman wore this in my old office and every time I smelled it, I'd have to resist the urge to hug her (and I didn't even like her very much).
• She compliments me on my nose at dinner, saying it looks like a lil turd (un mojonsito)... this sounds way cuter in Spanish.
• She's made me Puerto Rican coffee morning, noon and night, since I was little.
• She has been celebrating her Sweet Sixteen for the past 30 years.
• She's a die-hard Mets fan.
• She just recently retired but not because she was tired. 
• She recently told me that I remind her of one of those women from her novela... quite possible the best compliment I've ever received.
• She feeds her dog coffee and adobo chicken, which makes me jealous, which makes me kinda sad because that dog eats better than I do.
• Did I mention her dog's name is Chucky?
• Did I mention Chucky is a she? She was insistent on having a dog named Chucky and although the dog we found her was a girl... she was already committed to the name.
• She knows who Daddy Yankee is and is a fan of Reggaeton.
• Living in NYC most of her life, she's interacted with damn near every culture. This means she has funny lil anecdotes, but she always ends the story telling me she doesn't care who I bring home as long as they are good to me.
• She teaches me curse words in other languages.